When i got fired by Babyware

I think it was wrong right from the start, though I may be waiting long for, wishing I could do it but still it din long last. I dunno was the decision right, I think it's His will. I tried my best in everything, though my memory is always that bad but I put all my effort. Was I wrong? I just couldnt do like others, Im not as good as them. I really felt bad, yet it was gone. Did anyone see my heart? or was I invisible? Do I need to disappear so there wun be extra cost? I cant say it, I dun have the courage. I cant do it, I dun have the strength. And I cant make it happen, as I dun have powers. Can I change things around? Should I not waited for it? Now is just 1mth away, whr do I find it? It's not enough by that. Do you know my thoughts? Do you know how do I feel? U can say it easily cos I forgotten. I cant do anything with my brain. I cant make my brain better. Do u not forget too? I just need to restart everything. And U din give me. Was I that bad? I just need to change. Im willing to change. Or I really find another? Do I need to separate myself from them? I really want a LONG BREAK away from there~ Never to see them again. Apologies to those who treated me well. I have let u all down, I cant face u all anymore. I dun dare to say anything, Im not used to being treated well. Dun treat me too good, or U will regret. I cant reciprocate. I dun say it, it's not because Im quiet or blur. It's because I dun want to hurt ur feelings. I dun want to spoil the relationship. I really treasure u all alot!! All of u are precious to me. I cherish all of you everytime we meet, love the company wherever we go, laughing togethr. The great moments it's vivid and replaying in my mind. I accept it because it's a fact. I have to face reality, and I dun want to lie to myself. I cant bring my feelings to let u all know. I want u all to have a impression of me that Im always happy, carefree, outgoing, cheerful and sweet girl. Not the one who always cry, have bad attitude, loves to shout at people and get angry easily girl. I tried to do my best in everything u all asked me to do, not to complain, when get scolded change it, be more understandable and not letting u all worry. I dun want anyone to worry for me. I just want to be better and improved Maybelle.

Bye-Bi~

*P.S. Im not sure when I will write again but wait till my feelings are properly tidy, I will be back.*