tues

todae i din had a great day.. ytd received my chinese prelim paper.. i had a just pass for it.. was lousy.. todae received my maths paper1 and 2 both total marks failed plus my chem. which i just pass.. all was lousy.. havin some problems in my mind.. i kept wonderin 4 the past few daes about my decision.. y dun he tell me after my Ns?? im now so confused and vexed.. wat decision shuld i make? even recently i cant concentrate on anitink.. everidae just w8tin 4 his sms.. haiis.. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! i cant even relaxed.. i dunno what to do.. stress on my studies.. and now tis.. i dunno whtr shuld i reject or accept.. wat will happen for each decision i make?? be happie or regret?? i know he's a gd guy.. the wish i had alwaes been wishing for.. must have a kind heart, handsome, caring, alwaes lettin me, and so on... y must it happen now?? i dun have time to care abt tis thing now.. bt i just cant keep my mind off.. and in sch seeing N.G, also keeps my decision waverin... last time used to lyk him.. now after mitin him durin the class gatherin.. tinkin of him on and off... in sch missin N.G. , outside him.. i dunno wat to choose.. i cant keep him w8tin.. is either frens or not.. yes or no.. can anione help me?? im goin nuts soon.. it's drivin me up the wall ..

monday

oh man.. todae was a very bad day.. everitink was against watever tat i want.. i just dunno what went wrong and hurts me alot.. i have been reflectin tis past days.. i feel verii alone and just feel lyk quitin sch and end my life.. but i dun tink tat will work.. so i have re-tht my mind and just take it in my stride.. by the way just havin 1more yr of sch and tat's it.. i wanna hurry get out of tis sch and find new frends to carry on my life, nvr to make the same mistake ever again.. hope i will be 4given.. ^.^

thurs

todae was so tired.. early in the morning raining and i wanted to sleep in.. but too bad tat i have to prepare for sch.. do my usual stuff and head to sch.. chem lesson, mr osman in order to give sweets out he asked us to volunteer to answer the qns b4 gettin a sweet.. many ppl were raising their hands up and rushing to answer.. haha.. durin pe lesson was much more better den last week as it was more fun and enjoyable... just feel more freely tis time.. 2dae was actualli plannin to go for the fnN remedial bt wasnt sure is there any in the end and i din bring my wkshts.. so i din go and i went with my frens to eat mac after sch.. hehe.. plannin to go tm bt in the end head home as my fren wasnt feelin well.. so was quite bored.. im actualli quite nervous abt tis comin sunday youth service as i gt to stand in front and share sth which terrifyin me.. im nt sure whtr will i have sleepless nites.. hope God will help me in the way.. ^.^ seeya~ burbyes~

wed

todae feeling so down and lookin at the blue sky.. just feeling so different.. during lessons was tired and sleepy.. as usual my classmates were making jokes and laughing away.. during pe. had to play handball which i just played last week.. tis time everione did wore the attire and more people were playing.. separated in 2 big grps.. feeling abit weird.. i just had no sportsmanship at all.. im nt so sporty and dun realli like sports.. my team captain asked me to be the goalkeeper.. i was wonderin i wuld sure help the team to lose.. so i just turned my head away.. so he chose others.. the boys were verii involve in the game.. while the gals were like slacking as they are not realli sporty or active.. still din feel well bcos of the flu and irritatin... after sch had the fnN remedial, which was dragging my time spendin at home.. bt durin the rem. i was verii lazy to do anitink.. just doing a qns in my grp and sharing the answers with everione.. after tat, i went a break with my frens eatin hashbrowns and onion rings.. sat for quite awhile and head home.. as i reached home, i had a tinkin.. i dunno why wuld i cant 4get him.. it's just nt the rite time.. bt i just cant.. i even nw had crushes on 2 guys which one is i see everidae and the othr is a wk once which im so confused.. i jus promised myself durin the june holidaes to 4gt the past or the startin of tis yr to 4gt it... i just cant bring myself to it.. i dunno why wuld i ended up like tis.. alrite.. enugh. bb.. seeya..